"The Case For Chastity Today" M&M's

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David R. Mickel

"...The first thing we've got to learn to control is ourselves.  Once we've done that we've proven we're worthy to control other things.  If we can't control ourselves, we have no right to try to control anything else."

"There was a test made.  Second grade students were given an option.  A stranger came into the classroom, was introduced by the teacher and said, "Here I have a package of M & M's."

If you're in the second grade and see a package of M & M's, what's your logical hope?  Do each of us get one of those?  The stranger said, "Here's what I'm going to do," and pours out five M & M's into little cups and has each of the kids seated in a chair around a table with a cup in front.  He pours five into each cup and says, "Now, I'm going to leave.  I'll be back in 20 minutes.   You can either have the five M & M's now or, if you wait and they are still there when I get back, I'll give you the whole sack.  It's up to you."  He smiles and walks out.

"A hidden camera is recording the faces of these perplexed little children.  They're looking at those M & M's.  And they're lusting and they're coveting.  And not one of them made it.   Every one of them gobbled down the candy.  Of course when the man came back there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth.  But they didn't get the rest of the M & M's because that was part of the deal.  None of them could see the long range goal, only the short-term pleasure.

"Then the stranger went to a fifth grade class and did the same thing.  What do you think happened this time?  Two-thirds of them chose not to eat their M & M's; but only one-third stuck by their decision.  None of the third that made it through the twenty minutes stayed at the table.  Every one of them wisely got up, walked over to some other part of the room, and did something to take their minds off the five M & M's in those cups.  The last third never hesitated.  As soon as he was gone, they gobbled the candy down.  The remaining third wanted to go along with the first third and not eat the candy, but they still sat there kind of enjoying the temptation, really lusting after the M & M's, holding them up to the light, and smelling them.  Finally they lusted long enough that they couldn't resist the temptation any longer and ate them.  And these were they who were sorely repentant and sorrowful when the man came back in with the full packages.  Biblically, they were the foolish virgins."

"Mormon youth should have the capacity when it comes to things like sexual urge, to look past the five M & M's, to look past the immediate gratification of a few sexual pleasures, which anybody can have, to the permanent joy that is waiting for them in the long run.  So think of whether you want to be like the second grader or like the fifth grader when it comes to real happiness."

"We're like that.  We all want to have fun.  Heavenly Father wants for us to have fun.  If you're not having fun, it's usually because you're not following the guidelines.  You've got your own guidelines.  You've joined the 'I know all the rules, but I'm different' club."

"I saw a letter from a young lady who said, "Had I known five minutes before I had relations with him how I would feel five minutes after I had to give my baby away, I would never have let him touch me."

"If a young man wants to touch you, it's not because of love.  He's selfish.  He wants something from you."

"Consider this example: 

"Dearest Melody,

I'm a disillusioned young man.  "Last night I was out with 
the girl I love, the girl I want to marry.  And she allowed me 
certain intimacies no girl should allow anyone but her husband. 
It was my fault.  I thought I wanted them.  I begged and coaxed 
and she gave in because she loves me and wanted to please me and make me happy.  It didn't make me happy.  I'm miserable.  I 
realize now that I didn't really want her to give in to me.  I hoped she was strong enough to keep saying no.  I wanted a girl I was sure was sweet and clean.  I wanted a girl who could keep saying no to me, the one she loves, so I could know positively she was saying no to any other boy, too.  She is a sweet, good girl, and I do want to marry her, but I will never feel quite the same about her.  From now on I will be very stern with myself. I'm afraid she would let me go all the way if I asked, and then I would hate both of us.  I do want her for my wife.  But I want to wait for a husband's privileges until we're married.  I guess women are born with a desire to give and give to make their men happy.  I wish they could realize that sometimes they make us happiest by a good, firm, unyielding no.  Please say no next time.  I love you." 
Sincerely, Michael 
"If being together brings about compromises and lowering of standards as so many relationships do, BAIL OUT!!!!"